I have to lose weight
I’m just struggling so much right now. my mental status is shit. i’m reminiscing about my eating disorder and how i looked when i was 78 pounds and i want that again. i hate eating. i’m not eating lunch. i’m not eating unless i’m forced to. i’m secretly exercising, over-exercising. i feel like the only way to tell my treatment team that i’m struggling so much is if i keep losing weight
i know i need more treatment. but i can’t go back into PHP, i’m going to keep fighting it until i LOOK like i need more treatment
but i can’t deal with anything right now, i’m so dizzy from not eating and schoolwork is overwhelming and i can’t handle it anymore.
i just don’t know what to do except lose more weight. it’s becoming my priority again.


